Confessionals (Week 11)

My plan worked and Charlie has unfortunately left, but not after a few words with yours truly! Too bad I could care less about what he thinks. So what if I don't win challenges? All that does is put a target on your back anyways. I rely on strategy... something Charlie clearly lacked considering he was just voted off 6-1. Once again, I'm sitting pretty! My only concern at this point is an idol. I have Juliet, Eko and Desmond wrapped around my finger. The only way I'm leaving is if Sun and Ben pull a fast one on me.

My only concern tonight is Desmond. I know I've got Eko and Juliet with me 100%. But Desmond worries me just a little bit. He should be smart enough to see that he's going to get dumped off in 4th place eventually if he sticks with us, but maybe he thinks Eko and I are going to take him all the way? When I talk to him he seems committed to our group, but he has definitely been shady in the past.

As it sits right now, we are going to vote Ben unless he wins Immunity. If he wins, Sun will probably leave. I just have to hope Desmond doesn't side with them and attempt to force a tie. If I make it through this round, I am definitely F3 bound.

Eko reassures me that Desmond isn't going to flip on us and that he's dead set on sticking with us. I can only hope that's how Desmond really feels about the alliance. I am going to be livid if I go home tonight.

The shittiest thing is that I'm pretty sure Sun and Ben are going to try and have me voted off. It only makes sense because Juliet has the idol, and I'm a way bigger threat than Eko and Desmond are. It probably doesn't help that I bitched at Charlie last night as his torch was being snuffed, but that was just fun more than anything.

I just have to stick to my guns tonight. Hopefully an idol (if it even exists) isn't played and hopefully I don't go home. The thought of someone like Sun making it further than me makes me want to vomit.

So tonight is the last night to play the idol. I'm scared because Ben won Immunity and he might just give the idol to Sun. I'm 99% positive those bitches will vote me out if she plays it, and I will go home. But who's to say they even have an idol to play?

Regardless, I've had a great run. If tonight is my night than so be it. It will suck going out before a few of these players, but I've played my hardest and I'm crossing my fingers!